Saturday, January 14, 2017

Fish story

Long ago, when I was a sports reporter and editor, one of my tasks was to edit "Fins, Fur and Feathers," the local column for outdoorsmen. That wasn't the only outdoor column I handled. There was another, written by a moonlighting game warden who had taken a course called "News and Article Writing for Recreation Managers" at my alma mater, Moo U.

Moo U did not have a journalism course but it did offer two credit courses in journalism. I took the other one.

"News and Article Writing for Recreation Managers" apparently taught its students never to call a thing by its name. A fish was not a fish but "a member of the finny tribe."

Eddie, who wrote Fins, Fur and Feathers, had not attended Moo U but had picked up a similar method somewhere else. This led to some memorably awful writing. A flounder was not a fish but  a doormat. So once, when the fish-murderers had had a successful weekend pulling up large flounders, Eddie reported that "the bay was paved with monster doormats."

A pair of monsters

Eddie moonlighted, too, but he seemed to put more effort into Fins, Fur and Feathers than into his real job, which was being president of a small savings-and-loan association. Those were the days when running an S&L was not demanding work. The gummint allowed S&Ls to offer a quarter-percent higher interest on time deposits and to lend on residential mortgages.

This may seem like unnecessary gummint regulation but when the regulatory stranglehold was relaxed, the S&L business was taken over by more fearsome predators than Eddie ever encountered around Chesapeake Bay. By that time, though, Eddie and his S&L were gone.

The job may have been undemanding but it was possible to underperform.  While Eddie was out murdering ducks, his cashier, a middle-aged virgin, was performing good works with Eddie's customers' money.

In not much more than 10 years, she donated more than $2 million to her church. In those days, the cashier at a small S&L couldn't have been paid more than $20,000 a year, but the preacher and his vestrymen never stopped to wonder how the cashier -- I think her name was Evelyn -- could contribute $20,000 a month to the church.

Anyhow, that is not the only reason I am automatically skeptical when Christians offer to instruct me about morality, but it's one of them.




12 comments:

  1. Anyhow, that is not the only reason I am automatically skeptical when Christians offer to instruct me about morality, but it's one of them.


    Iron clad proof, in one sentence, about how limited, to the point of non-existence, your understanding of Christian morality is.

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  2. I understand it just fine, thanks. I just don't think Christian morality has anything to do with human morality.

    The reverse, if anything.

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  3. Harry, again "All Hat and No Beef."

    Why not just tell us what human morality is and then we can compare it to other moralities on our own.

    No need for references to obscure moralists or other experts.

    Just tell us your own words.

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  4. It does not include murdering people for failing to believe in non-existent spooks.

    So, human morality is entirely unlike Christian morality

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  5. In not much more than 10 years, she donated more than $2 million to her church.

    I thought changing the subject was frowned upon around here?

    Or did you lie about that, too?

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  6. Which her church happily accepted without wondering where the money came from. But, anyhow, you asked what human morality is, and I told you.

    It does not do you credit that you either don't understand it or don't approve of it.

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  7. But, anyhow, you asked what human morality is, and I told you.


    Harry, it is bad enough that you so comprehensively misrepresent what other people write; it is a disaster when you do it to yourself.

    A. I never asked what human morality is.

    B. You didn't tell me what human morality is, you told me what it isn't.

    Fail. Fail. Fail.

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  8. Yawn

    Your only defense against the indefensible.

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  9. I am not defending anything. What I said speaks for itself. I am (still) yawning because your feeble attempts are a) boring and b) self-refuting.

    I am content to have anyone who follows these treads read through them and draw obvious conclusions. They won't need my help figuring out the meaning.

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  10. What I said speaks for itself.

    Yes, your reading comprehension, even of your own writing, sucks.

    Me: Iron clad proof, in one sentence, about how limited, to the point of non-existence, your understanding of Christian morality is.

    Harry:

    I understand it just fine, thanks. I just don't think Christian morality has anything to do with human morality.


    ...

    But, anyhow, you asked what human morality is, and I told you.


    Behold the wonders of the direct quote. I didn't ask you what Christian morality is, I asserted you don't understand it. You respond by saying what it isn't, providing as vacuous a phrase as I have ever read.

    Then follow up by a perfect example of inability to comprehend the glaringly obvious.

    I'm not sure whether to add this to Harry's Shenanigans, or your ever growing Big Bag o' Bollocks.

    I think the latter; you can't possibly have gotten the obvious so wrong, so your inner liar took control.

    (And, just to be clear, I tag these things because I it provides the perfect handle to witness the progressive mind in action.)

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